Okay I was about to head to bed with the Good Book and I came across a blurb that I had to share with you. Now in the scheme of things since I like a really clean house I am not into pets that much...especially ones that shed/drool or require a litter box. I dislke having to clean a fish tank! But for the sake of the kids experiencing the responsibility of having pets (yah like WHO looks after them?) we have had fish, dogs and cats. We currently have a Black lab who sheds, drools and since he is quite old...vomits. But personally if I have to have a pet I will go with a cat - cleaner and while dogs drool I really do believe cats rule. So the following is for all you cat lovers! haha
DIARIES OF THE DOG AND CAT
Our lab Sam
"Excerpts from a Dog's Diary"6:00 am - At last! I Go Pee! My favorite thing!
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing! 1
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
6:00 pm - They're home! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
Mitzy
"Excerpts from a Cat's Diary"Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Bastards!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies." I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...
haha - have a great evening y'all!
Blessings!
Julie
4 comments:
Love this, I will definitely be copying it. I am an equal opportunity pet owner one dog and two cats, I think I am more a cat person, but at least the dog shows me he loves me! As the owner of an aging labrador (at least by the picture I assume he is aging) you really must read Marley and Me by John Grogan. One of the best reads I have had in a long time. I also love the box you made for your mom, I sure wish I lived closer so I could pick up all these neat things when they come in - on the other hand, it is probably safer on my bank account to have this distance between me and JSI. I love reading your blog and although I don't know you or your family well, you seem to have an awful lot of love and good things going on. I identify with your concerns for your son in Shiloh, why is it our children chose such dangerous professions? At any rate, keep on blogging, I love to see all your creations and read your words.
Thanks Liz - your comments are so encouraging. You should get a blog up and going too! Yes Sam is old - about 11 1/2 and getting more and more arthritic! His days of fetching are coming to an end.
Makes me think of the joke:
The dog thinks of his owner, "You feed me, give me water, show me love ... You must be God."
And the dat thinks of his owner, "You feed me, give me water, show me love ... I must be God"
Funny.
This was very funny. Thank-you so much! I needed a laugh today.
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